rolificacyofpoputionandscarcityofnaturalresourceshavemadeabortionaablephenomenonofthemodernworld．agineaworldwithtoomanypeopleandnootherlivinganimal?ThatiswhyIstresstheyofbirth-trol．Butthen，youneverknowwhetherthebabyyoudidn’thavewasagenius!ermitmillionsofaveragebabiestobeborn,buttomissageniuslikeKingDimitriwouldbeagreatlosstotheworld．IfthereweremoreKingDimitris，theywouldbuildabeautifulnewworld，wherelifewouldbebetter，richerandmoremeaningful．Inmypointofview,thoughIamallforbirth-trolIamnotpro-choice．Ibelieveabortionisnecessaryforvictimsofrape，iandothermedicalreasons．Butforthosewhobeepregnantbecausetheirbirth-trolmethodsdidnotwork，Ithinktheyshouldshouldertheresponsibilityofparenthood.”Aishastoodup，hershapelynakedbodymovingeffortlesslyamonghervastresourcesofknowledge．Shechoseabook，turothechapteronPre-historicArtandhaoDorna，saying，"Thesearepicturesoffresthewallsofcaveswheremanliveddurioheydepiandwomenindifferentsexualpositions．Thisisahugestonepilr．Atfirst，nooneknewwhatitmeant，butarcheologistscametotheclusionthatitwasthesymbolofapenis，whichprimitivepeopleworshipped．Atthattime,maoliveingroupsiosurviveandbatthedangersofthenaturalworld，soproliferationbecameasacredduty．Butinthemodernworldtoday,overpoputionandscarcityofnaturalresourceshavebeethenumberoneproblem，soourpriorityistotrolthegrowthofworldpoputionandnotwasteourresourcesthoughtlessly．Lookingatthosecrude，primitiveetgs，DornawasremiheoddstancesofNatalie，acssicballetdancer，doingheryogaexercises．Whenshedanced,herstylishpoise,matchlessgrace,legandsymmetrywereunfettable．

"Musttherebeamanandawomaninmakingababy?"

"Ofcourse,mydearlittleapple!"ughedAisha．

"No，Idon’tbelieveit．Ithinkawomandoitallbyherself!"

"That’simpossible!"

"ThenhoweNataliemadeababyallbyherself?"

"Whatdidyousay?"Dornaseemedonthevergeofsayingsomething,butstopped．

4

"Whatwereyougoingtosay?"

"Nothing!"repliedDorna,makingaface．

Natalie:

Nataliewasextremelyshybynatureaalmostallhertimeeitherexerginthegymordangoageoftheauditorium．Atrueartist，shekeptastrictdiettomaintainthelightnessandbuoyancyrequiredofaballetdancer．ShespokewithaheavyRussia，sothenguagebarriermayhavebeenthereasonwhysheseldomunicatedwithothers，butherdimpledsmileandpleasingdispositionendearedhertoeveryone．ShewastheoppositeoftheoutgoingandoutspokenDorna，whobecameonafirst-namebasiswithalmosteveryoheKingdomofDreamsafteronlyafewmonths．DornamadefriendswithCortezandKojak，KingDimitri’stwotigers，whousuallysatbeforethethrone，andshewouldroamthehillstogetherwiththem．DornabecameiedinNatalieafterseeingherperformintheballet"TheBearaerfly"．Herbeautifuldangdepictedthefroliebutterflyflutteringdelicatelyamongthemyriadofflowersupthehilnddownthedale．Herswayingfigureseemedtobebahestemofaflowerorabdeofgrass．Heretherealbeautymadeherseemmorelikeaspiritthanahumanbeing．Theotherrole，thebear，wasofcourseperformedbyKingDimitri．Thestartlingtrastbetweenthebig，heavybodyandclumsymovementsofthebearandthedelicatebutterflyproducedaicaleffect．Theaudience,whilemarvelingatthepowersoftheSupernaturalBeingwhocouldcreatecreaturessooppositeinappearaemperament，alsoappudedtheimaginationailityofthechrapher，KingDimitri．Therewerethreeathedance：

Act1

Onaheavilyfoggyspringm，thebearwaswanderingaimlesslyinthewidefieldsandmeadows．Abutterflyflewupanddownandaroundhim，butalwayswithinashortdistance，asifleadinghimtowardssomedestination．Curious，thebearfollowedher，fppinghisarms，imitatingherflying．Theheavymistgavehimaprivacyotherwiseimpossible，lettinghimreverttohisnaturalhrowingawaythehypocrisyofmundanede．Butthenthebearrealizedthathenolongerreposedinahumanbodyandthereforedidnothavetobotherwithhumaris．Peingthedensefog，hefoundmoreclustersofflowersthanhehadeverseeninthemeadows，headsbenttogetherasifwhisperingineachother’sears．Ashewenton，aseaofflreetedhim，whisperingthatitwassaidaFlowerFairywouldbeborhefirstraysofsunshineappeared．Smittenbycuriosity，thebeartiofollowthebutterfly．Gradually，anobscurerayofsunshiratedthefog．Hezigzaggedonnotknowingwherehewasorwhichwayhetook．Thenhecametothefootofahill．Thewihefogawaytotheothersideofthemountain．Sunshineburstout．Hesawaseaofexuberantflowersflutteringandswayinginjoy，hailihoftheFlowerFairy．Butterfliesflewoutoftheflowersaerflyandthebearsoonjoihecrowdanddisappeared

Act2

Thebearwelyintotheseaofflowers．Thousandsofbutterfliesflewamoheringpollen．Flowerspetedforattention，usingtheirbeautyandfragratracttheirrovingandflitteringbeaus．Tothebutterfly,theywereasexualsymbol．Theirretionshipwasoweentheluringandtheluredtoreachtheaimofreproduforthetinuationofthespecies．Followingthesoundofflowingwater，thebearcametoastreambesideawood．Suddenly，anexquisitelybeautifulgirlwithlong,snow-whitehairwasseendanginthewoods．Sheseemedtobehalf-floatingintheair，hertoestouglightlyoipofthegrassandflowers，totallyunsciousofherradiayandmatchlessgrace，bentonlyonexpressingherjoyofbirthintothisworld．WhatshedidnotknohenGodcreatedflowersandgavethembeauty，healsoputonthemaandnottocauselustinothers，eventhoughuionally．Todosowassinful．ThiseciallytruefortheFlowerFairy,whohastosetanexampleforallhersubjedthereforehadtobemorechastethahers，orshehastoapologizetoGodbydeath．

Act3

Thebearhidbehindatreetowatchthisfasatingseunnoticed．ThebeautyandgraceoftheFlowerFairyseemedoddlyfamiliaruntilherememberedthebutterflythathadledhimhere．

4

"Coulditbeshe?"heaskedhimself．"Ifso,tourpose?"Afeelingofuntrolblelustfilledhisheartuntilhewaorushoutandembraceher．Butwhenhelookedathishairypawsandbody，hewasashamedandrememberedhewasnolongerhuman．Justthentheserpent,aofthedevil,slithereduptohimandsaidfawningly，

"gratutionsyoungman!Satan’scurseonyouexpiresthishourandyouareoncemorethehandsomeyoungmanyoembraceyourFlowerFairy!"Thebearlookedathimselfandlo!hehadresumedhishumanshape．Overjoyed，herushedoutaheFlowerFairytightlyinhisarms．Shescreamedandstruggledauroaerlilyfadingandwitheringbeforehisveryeyes.Theyoungmanstoodtheredumb-founded．Hewasfilledrofoundremorse,forhissinful,mortallusthadkilledanew-bornFlowerFairy，long-awaitedandweledbyalltheflowers．TheaseattheGardenofEdenhadrepeateditselfoncemore．

Afterherroutineworkout，Nataliecamedownfromthestageandsatohefros．Sherestedherrightfootonherleftthighandbeganuntyingthecesofherballetshoes．OernoonnaughtygirlDornawasrunningaroundthehillswithhertwofriends，CortezandKojak，Then，tootiredtowalk，shedecidedtorideonthebackofCortez．Nataliesattherestaringintospace,motionlessasamarblestatue,hersnow-whitebodyinvividtrasttothebckvelvetsofa．Timeslippedbyassilentlyassandthroughthelong，slenderfingersofabeautifulwoman，oraspainstakingasthehsssetinthequiet，deeprecessesofanapace．ThiswastheposethatDimitrifourang，thebinationoffeminiyandmaseease．ShethoughtofherfirstmeetingwithDimitriunderverysimirsurroundings．Astheywentpastthewoods,shediscoveredalonelyfigureinabikinibathingsuitoretchofbeachbytheke,pyingidlywiththesaingitslipslowlythroughhersleaperingfingers．Oncloserscrutiny,DornafounditwasNatalieanddecidedtopyapracticaljokeothetime,shewastheballerinaoftheRussianNationalAcademyofBalletonherfirsttourtotheU.S.andalractithestageearlyeverymbeforeanyoneelsewasaroundaswasher.anddidnotpaymuchattentiontothejanitorwhowasonduty.Dornaorderedhertwofriendstorunfrenzilyaroundthebeachlettingoutloudferociousroars.ThetwotigersenteredfullyintothespiritofthegameandzealouslycarriedoutherivingtheunsuspegNataliesuchascarethatshefainteddeadaway.WhatisTime?Whatsignificedoesithave?Sandslippedslowlythroughherfingersastheydidinthehssofaimes.Toknowthemeaningandthesignifie，weshouldknoasinhermindasshenguidlytoyedwiththesandandwatcheditslippingthroughherslenderfingers．Butshenoticedthathewouldstophisworksometimesandwatchhermovementsattentively.Onceshecaughthimstaringatherwhileshewasuntyinghershoecesjustasshewasdoingnow．Herdimpledsmileoffriendlyreitionwaslikeripplesonashallowpondandencedhimtoapproachheronemandaskheropiniononapoemhehadwritten,whichhefeltwouldbeagoodthemeforaballet．Dornasighedandsaid，"Oh，you’reahopelessninny!"Shecalledtothetwonoisy,prangtigerstostopandraoNatalie．Shecalledtoher,shookher,butalltonoavail．Natalie’sshouldersandspine,uprighta,gaveherastatelycarriage．Herbeautifulbreastswerejustvoluptuousenoughtobecuppedbyahand．Herabdomen，perfedtightasadrum，wasadorheterbyherumbilication．Onreadingit，shewasgreatlyimpressedandmarveledatthedepthofhisknowledgeofballetandwonderedwhatothertreasureswerestoredinthebrainsofthisgeniusuheguiseofaonjanitor．Herenthusiasticresponsedrewthemtogetherandafterthattheyoftendiscussedtheadaptationofhispoemsintomusiddance．Realizingshemighthavegooofar,Dornawasremorseful．Sheranbadforthtothekescoopingupwaterwithherbarehandsandspshingitoionlesswoman，tryingtoreviveher．WhenNataliefinallycametoandopenedhereyes,DornaapologizedprofuselyforherrashnessandcalledthetwotigerstohersothatNataliecouldseeforherselftheywereonlyCortezandKojakandwerereallyharmless．Shewastheperfectpolishedmarblestatueofanakedwoman，exceptthatshehadwarmthandove,butshesattheremotionless,lettingtimeslipbysilentlybetweenherfingers，justasthewomanonthebenchdid．WhenNataliesawthetwoslinkoutdocilelyfrombehireesatDorna’sbedcalsifashamedoftheirpartintheprank,shecouldn’thelpsmiling．Butshewasstillinshodfelttooweakandlimptowalk，soDornahelpedherontothebackofKojak，whilesherodeonCortez，awoofthemwentbacktothepacetogether．Suddenlysheseemedtothinkofsomethingandstooduptogetherballetslippersandputthemon．Hermovementsweresogracefulthatwhetherstanding，bendingorsitting，herfigurehadperfectsymmetryay．Wheruckaposeooes，herfeetformedtwoperfectarches，liketwolovely，tinycrestmoon.Oneday，DimitrimaogetherawayfromuhesurveilnceofhersuperiorsandbroughthertohisKingdomofDreams．

AfterDotbacktoherroom，shestillfeltpeandwasafraidNataliemightsufferfromtheaftermathofhershock．Climbingoutofherwindow,sheralyalongtheeavestopeekandseehowshewasdoing.Herarms，whetherbentht，werebeautifulliketheleavesofhousependingoutnaturallyandartistically．Theartedtodanamagnifitleapingmovement，thebrightcherrycoloredvaginawasclearlyvisible．Hertaperingfingerspyedwiththewaterasifstrummingonherheartstrings．Herfleshbodygraduallymeltedinthewarmsun．

Dimitriturnedoverandopenedhissleepyeyes．Theskywasalreadydarkandadornedbyafewtwinklingstars．"Timetogetup"hethought，buthewastroubledbyhispeniswhichwashardandstraightasever，likeared-hotrod．

"Weallhaveourproblems,”hethought．"Womeheirmenstrualperiodandmeroubletrollingtheirpenises.”Heinhaleddeeplyandthenheldhisbreath，foghisattentiononthepoiweenhispenisandhisanusforaslongashecouldbeforelettinghisbreatheoutagain．Herepeatedthisseveraltimesandwasextremelypleasedtofindthatthisinfalliblemethodofhisreallyworked，forhispenishadshrunktoitsnormalsize．HegotreadytoleavewhilethemousecameoutofitsholesqueakingandrunningaroundunderDimitri’sfeet．Themousebroughtbackmemoriesofhischildhood,butnothaviimeforreminiscejustthewoleftthehuttogether,themousetotheleftandDimitritht．Aftertheirdeparture，awindroseanddarkcloudscoveredthemoonandstars．

Chapter5LifeStoriesofNovel,Elina,Romi,Deanna

WhiteFairyandMedusa

NovelandElina:

Thehuge，ahouse，anantiquityinitself．itchbck，exceptforthedimly-litkitfromwhichthetemptingsmellofbeefstewfloatedoutintothedarknight．Thefatmouselickeditslips，anticipatingagoodmeandscurriedtowardstheholethatwashisusualentrahiswasoneofhisfavoritehuntinggroundswherehewassuretofinddeliorselsandhewasfamiliarwitheveryer．Thearshaappearedi．Shewasabig,fatwomaninherfifties,withcurlyhairandingevillooksatedbyhereyes，whichweredmeaookoutabig,sharpknife，carefullycoateditwithathickyerofhoney,ptheterahalfprotrudingfromtheedge，sothattheslightestmovementcouldtoppleittothefloor．Thiswashertrapforthebig,fatmousethatwastoointelligehepoisonousmorselsshepcedatstrategicspots，andcleverlyavoidedthetrapssheset．Shelookedsmuglyatherhandiwork,fidentofsuccessthistime,areatednoiselesslyasaghostintothedarkness．Herprivatequartersothekitwerekeptdarkasshewaitedforthequarrytoeandbitethebait．Lowvoiceswereheardversing，herhighsopranotrastingwiththelowtrabassofthemaintenanJamaz,atall,bckbruteofaman,ashardasnails．

4

"What’sshe’sbeendoing’now-a-days?"

"Lordknows"sheshrugged．"Shedonelockherprettyselfinherroomandain’tatenordrank．Shedidnevercallforme．Nosir．The"she"theyweretalkingaboutwasMrs.Silkise，theneedmistressofthehouse．

"Ifwecouldonlythinkofawaytoyhandsonthedoughhermaher，thetwoofuscouldlivehappilyeverafter．"

"Youmeanyouwanttobateherandclumpme?"

"Ofcoursenot!She’stoohighandmightyandnotmycupoftea．You’remymainthingwoman．Ionlywantustolivewellwithouthavingtoworkforit.”

"Youdumbhere’snowayshe’sgonnagiveyoutheeye．Man，yougonehavetousefosebro．Onceyouhaveher..."

"You‘retellin’meIaimehemoneyandthehoney?"

"Butthat’stoogoodforyou,youbum.”

"ButIswornIwon’fetyou,Marsha．You’vebinonyourfeetalldayandmustbetired．Here,I’llmassageyoulegsforyou…PeoplesaytheydoneseeMr．Silkise’sghostwalkingaroundthehouseandgarden．Haveyouseenhim?"

Justthen,therewasaloudcrash,followedbypitifulscreeg．Themouse,luredbythebeefstewandhoney,hadgohekit．Hefirstjumpedontoachair,thenontotheterandbegannibblingatthehoney．Ashetookonemorestepforward，theknifecrashedtothefloortakingthemousewithit．Thefatmousendedfirstwithathudandtheknifefellonit,nailingittotheground．

4

"Mytrapworked!"MarshacriedtriumphantlyandhurriedoutfollowedbyJamaz．Theypulledtheknifefromthebodyofthebleedingandmortallywoundedmouse,whledtohisfeetandstilttemptedtoescape．Jamazra，choppingatitmercilesslyseveraltimesuntilitbecameabloody,imass.Initsshortlifethemousehadbeenfortunateenoughtoescapeinnumerabletrapsanddangers,butthissttimehewasnotsolucky．Lowerlevenimalslivingwithinthefinesofhumansocietyusuallysharethistragid．

Takingtheoppositedirefromthemouse,Dimitriwentonhisway;buthehadonlytakeepswheextremepaininhislefteye,likebeingstabbedbyasharpneedleorpiercedbyaknife．Hisrighteyehadbeenblindsincechildhood,andnowhisleftvisionwasgoingtoo．Heitentlyopenedhiseyestolookaheadofhimandthenwouldwalkforawhilewithhiseyesclosed.Theterriblepaincausedtearsandnasalmucustostreamuntrolblydownhisface．Hewouldwipeatthemsurreptitiouslywithhissleeves，buttheykepting．Dimitribowedhisheadaclosetothewalltoavoidtheattentionofpassersby．Thepedestrianstalkingandughing，themotoristswhizzingbyintheircarsseemedhappyandpurposeful,makingDimItrifeelhewasthemostunfortunatemanoreetbecausehehadtoputupwithsuchexcruciatingpain．Passingthescorchedremainsofanadultmovietheater,DimitrirememberedhowtheyusedtogeadseveryFriday.Hewouldloiteraboutandstareatthem,fetfulofhiswhereaboutsuntilpeoplewouldstopincuriositytoseewhathewasstaringatandhewouldbedrivenawaybytheirsnickering．Occasionallyhewouldbuyaticketandgoin．Butnowitwasonlyaheapofruins．Onlyhalfaposterremainedshowingtherumpofanakedwomandoggiefashionhighupintheair．Themenandwomenwhohadmadelovewiththeirfleshbodiessofuriouslyandwithsuchabando,hadnowallgoneupinsmokeandfire．Hewastherewhenthefirebrokeoutandhesawanunreizablebodybeingcarriedout,coveredwithneer．Hestillfeltnauseouswhenherememberedthesmellofhumanfleshburnttoacharcoallogsothatnoonecoulddeterminewhoitwas，orwhetheritwasmaleorfemale...

Dimitriwokefromhisreveriewithastart，rememberioseeDr．ElinaGelbart．Buthowcouldhegotoseethatbeautifulyoungwoman，dirtyandsmellyashewas?Heturnedbaton9thStreet,turoghatowothelounityCollegeandmadefym．Hehadalockerthere,#45,whereheputhisestclothes．HeohisoldfriendDavid,theharelippedjanitavehimatowein.Dimitriwasgreetedbyawaveofhotsteam,apaniedbynoisyshoutsandughterofyoungathletesshafterpractice．Ifitweren’tforhisappoiwithDr．Gelbart，hewouldbecurledupinadarkerofhisdipidatedshelter,motionless，eyesclosed，sufferinginsilendresignation．Thepain，whichwasrendinghissoupart,wasliketherippingsoundoftearingpaper,butDimitrienduredallthiswithinfiiehefleshbodycouldgivepleasure，hereasowasonlytobeexpectedthatitwouldalssuffering．Sonow,heforcedhimselftobearthepainofkeepinghiseyesopen．Helookedaroundhimandsawagroupofbigbhandrowdy．Astheymovedabout,hemusclesoftheirmagnifitbodiesbulgedeffortlesslyasiftheyweremadeofbronzeandnotoffleshandblood．Dimitristooduheshowerandclosedhiseyes，lettiwatersoothehistiredbody．Ititytheswimmingpool，whichwasdamageddurihquake，hadnotbeenrepaired；otherwise，theswimmingteam，withboysasstrongandmuscurasthesewouldbetraining，too．Histhoughtsturheteamofbasket-ballpyershesawonhiswaytothegym．Thecoachuttihroughtheirwarm-uppractidtheirvirile，aggressiveresponsesbroughtasparkofyouthfulexuberaoDimitri’sheart．Theversationaroundhimhadturogirlsandsex．Aionallytalndwellbuiltyoungmanwasboastingofhisprowess.

"Howmanytimesdidyoumakeitstnight?"

"Eight．"

"Naw．"

"You’rekidding!"

"Gee-wez…”Excmationsofenvy,admirationanddisbeliefspurredtheyoungmanontorevealdetailsofhissexlife．

"...butshecouldn’ttakeitanymore．Shebeggedmetostopandytheremotionlessasifshewasdead,soIquit．Icouldhavegoneon.”

"BullSh1T!Ifyou’rethebullyousayyouare,whydon’tyougointothegirls’lockerroomdoorahemhaveit?"

4

"Areyme?"

"Yeah!Betyoutwentybucksyoudon’tdare．"

"Iwillifweallgotogether.”

"Whatd’yaguyssay?Shallwe?"

Dimitriughedhystericallywiththem．Thefireofyouthseemedtoburnoncemoreinhimayoungandstrongagain．

"Whatifmyeyesarepainful?”hethought.“Itwon’tstforever!Thatisn’tenoughtokeepmedown.”Withthespiritichero,heshavedanddressedtokeephisappoiwithDr.ElinaGelbart．

Reinginherrogchair,NovelSilkiseseemedtohavethoughtofalotofthings,butthenitalsoseemedthathermindwasabnkandfocusedonnothing．Frtillnightshesattherewwhytheskiesturnedfrhttodark．Timedidnotrunonaspecificschedule．Actually，therewasnoobjectivestandardtogoby．Alldependedonhowthefleshbodywasused．Whenthebodytbusy,timeflewlikeafleetingarrow；butwhenthefleshbodywasusedinastateofleisure,timesloweddownandmightseemedtoninterminably.Thereforemundanecalcutionofthehumanlifespanwasinaccurate．Timewasonlyafeeling，anobscureidea．Likefate，itwasaralstatebetweeentandent．Whenwerealizedthis，wecouldtrolthespeedoftimewithouremotions．Novelsuddenlyrecalledseeingawhitecloudattheerofherwindthedayandwonderedwhereithadfloatedto．Shefeltasthoughshewasthatcloud,floatingandsinkinginthewideexpaheseaoftime．

Stifffromsittinginthesamepositiontoolong，Novelyawnedandstretchedherselfzily．Herarmspausedinmidairwhehoughtofherhusband,Joshua,lyinginthatnarrowcoffinwithnospaoveabout,letaloretchhimselfwhecramped．Oh，howunfortablethatwas!EverySundaym，Joshuawouldsitontherogchairshewassittingonnow，smokinghispipeandgazingatthebeautifulndscapedgardenoutside．Nowhecouldnolongersmokeinthatnarrowcoffin，howcouldhestanditwhenhisyearningforasmokecameoverhim?Shehadinsistedonopeningthegsscoverofthecoffinthtentheerofhisshirtcolr,whichhappeobeslightlycurledup，undoubtedlyduetothecarelessnessofthecaretaker．Novelknewherhusbandwasmeticulousabouteverythingtothemidetail,awouldpiquehimtolieforeverinhiscoffininsuchashirt．Otherwisehewouldeventrytoclimboutofhiscoffinandstraightenhisruffledshirtbeforelyingbackagain．Joshuawouldfeeluneasyafulifthecreaseofhispantsweren’tstraight．Ifhishandkerchiefwasn’tcarefullyironedandproperlyfolded，he’drathergowithoutohecashinhiswallethadtobeironedandsedthateachbillexactlyfacedthesameway．Ifohemwereoutoforderorpcedupsidedown,hewouldfeelreallyirritated．Joshualivedinaworldboundedbyinvisibleandinnumerablerulesandpatterns,whichshapedtheinflexibilityofhischaracter．Evenhissexlifewasregutedandungeable，scheduledpunctuallyforeverySaturdaynight．HislovemakingandforepyweresoinvariableaablethatNovelfelthiscaressinghandoverherbodywaslikeaboredbus-drivergoingonhisroutie，alwaysuinglyonschedule.Butlifewithhimgaveherasenseofsecurity．Cuddledinhisarms,herheadonhisbroadshoulders,shesleptpeacefullylikeabeewhichhadflownintoapinkflower,snugglingwithinitspetalsanddrinkinghohroughits"needle"．Ah，nomore!NomorecouldJoshuasecretehoney．Shecouldnolongersuckoutsweethoneyfromhisbody．

Thehousethoughluxuriouswasold，sothefloorcreakedasMarshapuffedupthestairsandkhebedroomdoor．

"Novelhoney,I’vemadeyouyourfavoritebeefstewandboiledonion．Youhaveenallday．edownandhavesomedinner.”Inthedarkness,Novelwasstartledbythesoundofastomachgrowling．AtfirstshethoughtitwasJoshua’sstomach,butthensherealizeditwasherown．Livehumanstomaeededtodigestfood．

50页

"ing”shesaid．Thefullskirtsofherdelicatepalebluedressshowedoffhertinywaisttoitsfuldvantageasshewalkedslowlydownthewindingstairs.Stoppingatthebar，shetookabottlefromtheshelfandusedasyriodrawexactly25ccofbrandy,whichsheiedintoasmallwinegss.ThiswasoneofJoshua’sritualsthatheperformedeveryday,exceptwhenhewasill．Novelwassousedtoitthatithadbeeaditionedreflexwithher．Shetookherwiotheeboratelycarvedredwooddiningtablewhereshesatdowntoherlonelydinner．Shecutthestewedbeefwithherknifeandforkandcheweditslowlytosavorthefvorofthebeeftoitsfullest．Hercheekswereflushedfromtheeffectsofthebrandyandherrge，deepeyeswereclearaspoolsofautumnwater．HerGreoseandcherrylipsseemedmoreentingthaheeyesofthelust-filledJamazoutsidethewindoasreadytopounherlikeatigeronitspreywheMarsha’srestraininghandonhisarm．

"Don’tberash，"shewarned．

"Didn’tyousayIwastouseforce?"

"Nottonight．Thetimeisnotripeyet．Sheisaweak-willedwomaneasilydominatedandswayed,butsheisnofool．Wemustpnthiscarefully,stepbystep,oryou’llbeoutonyourears!Tonightyoingtotrickme．Honey,IwonnaseesomeaandI’llmakesureIsweetenyourhead．I’vetakencareofhersinceshewasababyandknowherwell．ListentomeandI’llletyouhavebothherbodyandhermoney.”

"Yes，ma’am．Yes，ma’am,"saidJamaz，givingheraical90degreeJapanesebowandsneakedawayassilentlyashecame．

Marshawasuneducated，butwilyanding．ShepouseNovel’swhiteandtenderbodytohookJamaz；andusehisbrutandforcefulnaturetotrolNovel．Inthisway,shewouldbeinabsolutetrolofthetwoandnaturallyoftheSilkise’sfortushewasn’tgoingtolethimhaveitthateasily．Shewasgoingtobaithimtillhebeggedforit．Marshawalkedintothediningroomandsatbythetable．

"Howd’yalikethestew,Novelhoney?"

"It’sdeliarsha．SuchapityJoshuaolongerenjoyit.”

"It’sallthewillofthegoodLordhoney,sodon’tthinkaboutitallthetime．He’sbeengoneamonthnow．Areyouscaredatnightsleepingalloairs?"Novelshookherheadandsilentlykeptoing．Marshawashernanny,whohadtakencareofhersinceshewasababyandhadewithhertohernewhomewhenshemarriedJoshua．Sheneverdreamedthatthewomanshesidereddearesttoheroherparents,wasnowpnningtobetrayherforhermoney.Evenworse,shewascuttingheruplikeabutchertosellherpiecemeal．

Dimitrifelthisclosedeyelidbeilyopenedbyasensitivehandandabeamoflightshotintohislefteye.Thecloseface-to-faceexambroughtawaftranhermisty,goldenhair,mihthelight,femiitofherbreath．Hewasremindedofachildhoodmemory,howheusedtowatchspellboundasthewatchrepairmanwwithagsseye-pieceoverhiseye，usedintricatetoolstotoygingerlywithexpeches．Dimitrikhiswasafleetingmoment，soongone，sohetriedtoenjoyeverysedofittocaptureandprolongitstrahappiness．Elina’slivingroomwasdoneinwhiteandpurple．Thefloorwascoveredwithwhitecarpet,whilethesofasanddraperywerepurple．DimitriyfulllengthonthesofawhileElinasatbyhisside,bendioexaminehiseyes．Aftertheexam，Dimitriystill，whileElinatookapieceofpaperandbeganwritingherassessmentanddiagnosis．

5

Dimitrisufferedfromgenitalgua．Hisrighteyewasblibirth,butthelefteyeretainedsomeofitsfuns．Thenbeganaseriesicaloperations，thefirstofwhichtookpcewhenhewasonlythreemonthsold．InOctober1983，DimitricametotheBayAreaandwasfortunateenoughtoseeDr.Shaffer，arenownedeyeexpert．Hewasadevoutcatholidaremelykindandgperson,buthehadtogiveuphispracticeduetoageandreferredDimitritoDr．Heterrington，alsoafamouseyesurgeon．Buthewastheoppositeoftheolddoctorintemperament，beingcold，businesslikeaorenouncehispatientatanytime．However,underDr．HeterringtonDimitri’seyepressurewasmiraculouslytrolledafteronlyoion,buteyefimentstiogringintensepain．Dr．Heterringtonreei-infmmatoryFMLeyedropsfourtimesaday，graduallytodecreasetooncedaily．HeadmonishedDimitritouseitcarefullyasitcouldincreaseeyepressureifabused．Thenhehandedhimovertelbarttofightthefiments．Dr.Gelbartdiaghefimentstobecausedbygeofarcoftheeyebalftersurgery，soshetoldDimitritogobaLeyedropsfourtimesadaytocorrectthedition．Thismisjudgmeedinthedisastrousanduntrolbleincreaseofeyepressure．Dr.Heterringtonputatiny,pstictubetodrainthepressure,butitfailed．Dr.Gelbarttriedacryo-treatment，thedestruofthemoistureprodugfunoftheeyetotrolpressure．Thiswasadpainfuloperation,liketurningoffthefaucet，becauseitalsokilledtheeyeball,whieededmoisture．Itfailedtoo．Themostretsertreatmeohaveameasureofsuccessasitfinallystabilizedhiseyepressure．Dimitriknewhissightwasdoomed,butoverdoseofFMLhastenedhisdoomsdaybyapproximatelytenyears．

Elinagotupandwalkedovertoanothersofa．

"Youmaygetupnow,Dimitri．1wouldsuggestyouincreaseyourFMLeyedropstofourtimesadayinsteadofthepresentoncedaily.”

"Fourtimesaday?"

"Yes．Thepaininyoureyesisduetothegrowthoffiments．Beforethesurgery，youreyepressurewashighandyoureyeballswerefullofair，asitwere．Nowwiththedecreaseofeyepressure,youreyeballsaredeftedandthearcisged,thereforefimentsgrow．RaisingeyepressurebyincreasingFMLshouldsolvetheproblem.”

"Thankyelbart，I’lldoasyousay.”

"Don’tcallmeDr．Gelbartanymore．JustcallmeElina．I’mdivorced.”Herexpressionwassadandsheseemedtobepletelydifferentfromthelively,happyandeffitcareerwomanDimitriusedtoknow．

"I’msorrytohearthat．Ididn’tknow,”saidDimitriashetookhisleave．

"Wouldyouliketostayforawhilelongersowetalk?"Dimitriwasagreeablysurprisedatthisinvitationandacceptedwithacrity."Makeyourselfathome,Dimitri．There’ssomewiheet．Helpyourself．I’llberightback”shesaidaforthebathroom．

Elina’ssoft，tenderhandsseemedtohavemiraculoushealingpower,asDimitri’seyesnolongerhurtaftertheyhadbeentouchedbyher．Helookedaroundtheliving-room,leisurelyadmirieandskilloftheinteriordecorator.Eacharticletakenseparatelyinandordinary,butoncebroughttogetherproducedafasatingbinationthatgavetheroomauniqueair．Hiseyesfellonacrystalfruitbowlonthediningtable．Apineapplereedontheedgeofthebowloabunchoflusciouspurplegrapes,whiturnwasfles,onered,onegreen．Ierwereheapedabrilliantmixtureofcherriesandstrawberries．Somebananasyoherside,oneofwhichhadbeenstrippedandabitetakenoutofit,eeldanglinglimplyfromthesideofthecrystalbowl．Heheardthesoundofaflushingtoilet，followedbyrunningwaterihtub．SomehtheyearshehadknownElina,hehadassumedhertobesingleandwonderedwhatthematterwiththeeligiblebachelorsaroundtownwastoletabeautiful，attractivedoainsingleforsoloheyblind?SoitwasinceivabletoDimitrithatshewasmarried,letalonedivorced．

5

"Whatwasherhusbandlike?"hewondered．Suddenly,histhoughtsturheslender．refined-lookingmawheeppedoutoftheelevator．ElinawasjustseeinghimoffandintroducedhimasIketoDimitri．Ike’sshoulder-lengthblondhairwasfashionablydyered；hislongeyebrowsobviouslypluckedandlined.Heworenolipstick，buttwoenormousdiamonds，abouttwocaratseach，dangledonhisears．Hehadonatight-fittingsuit,awhiteshirtencolrandcarriedanoblongalligatordy’shandbaginhishand．HesmiledandsaidhellotoDimitriinhispleasantlowresonantvoice,whichbespokeofhismellow,friendlydisposition．Watghimwalkintotheelevator，Dimitrithoughtthatfrombehind,helookedlikeacharmingdy．

ingoutofthebathroom,Elinawalkedovertoherwineet,putadeterofwhitewiwowinegssesonatrayandcarriedthemovertothecoffeetable,wherethereileofhand-writtenmusipositions．Onthecewerethewords："versingwithaNudeAngel-dedicatedtothebeautifulwomanwhowasmywife."Elinapouredouttwogssesofwine,handedooDimitriandsaid,"Cheers!"Theysippedtheirwineinsilence．

"Ialwaysthoughtyouweresingle,Elina．Wouldyouliketotellmeaboutit?"

"That’swhatIwaalktoyouabout.”

"Isthatso?Whatkindofmanwashe?"

"Heisthatfeminine-lookingmanyoumetattheelevator，sodifferentfromwhathewaswhenIfirstmethimincollege．He’sawonderfulpianist,excellentforhisinterpretationofChopinandatalentedposerinhisht．Thisissomethieespeciallyforme”saidElina,pointingtothemusithecoffeetable．Dimitritookupthemusicsheetswithiandsawthattheywerebeautifullywritteniartistid．

"I’msureit’sabeautifundsuperbpieusic.”

"WhenIwasincollege,Iwasverypopurandhadalotofboyfriends．Onweekends，theywouldetothedormandtrytodatemeandIkewasohem．AtfirstIdidn’tpayatentiontohim,butonedayIfoundoutthathisloveformewastrue．Thatm,quiteafewofmybeauxturnedupandIdecidedtokeepthemwaitingandseehowmany,ifany,couldpassthetestofpatieupforthem.Oeraheygotimpatientofwaitinga，untilintheend,aftereighthours,onlyIkeremained．Hesatiingroomofthedorm,writingouthisnewporarycssiposition,whichhededicatedtome,soengrossedandiinhisworkthathelosttraeandsurroundings．Nimblefingersflewoverthewoodentableasifitiaowingtheinanimateobjectwithartisticpowers.Hummingandpying,hewouldstoptowriteoutafewbarsormakecorreswheupouneorhattune,writtenonthedayIdecidedtotestmybeaux，washisfirstpresenttome．He’sbeenwonit，revisingit，foralongtimeandtonighthebroughtmehishand-writtenpositionasapartinggiftinmemoryofourmarriage．We’vebeenseparatedforooseehowwestandaherdivorceistheonlywayout．Ilovehimandstillkeephispicturewithmeallthetime,butIkethinksweshouldendourmarriage.”ShetookoffthelocketandwhichsheworearoundhernedhaoDimitri,saying

"That’shim."Dimitriopehelocketandlookedatthesmallpictureinside．Hewasahandsomemanwithintelligent,-cutfeatures,mencholyblueeyesdeepastheseaandfulloflove．Hisartistidhairwaslybedandhewascasuallydressedinanavy-blueturtlenecksweater．

Eliohestoryoftheirromandmarriageinalow,pensivevoice．Aftershefoundouttheextentofhistrueloveforher,Elinafellheadoverheelsinlove．Shehadthisstrangefeelingthatshehadknownhimbeforeforalongtimeandknownhimwell．Everymovementcouldbringresoheyplungedheadlonginte．SheknewbeforehermarriagethatIkeotent,butshedidn’tcare．Shethoughtthatloveandlustweretwopletelydifferentthingsandshehadmarriedforlove．Butastimepassed，shegraduallybecameawareofsomethingmissing．Trueandpureastheirlovewas，itwasonlyamirage,gthedown-to-earthloveoftheflesh．Shecouldnolongerbesatisfiedwithansthesizeofalittlefinger．Ikeuoodandcametothepainfuldecisionthatitwasunnaturaltodenyherhealthybody．Heallowedhertohaveaffairswithothermen．Atfirst,Elinaagreed,buteverytimeshecamebackafterferociousandtempestuouslove-making，herhungerfullysatisfied，shewasstruckwithasenseofguiltandremorse．ThepaininIke’seyes,whichhetriedsohardtoceal,waslikeakuherheart．Theyfellintoeachothersarms,g．Therepetitionofthissebecameanightmareuntiltheyfeltthattotihisretionshipwascrueltobothofthemanddecidedonseparatioheirfeelings．Theypartedamicably，stillverymulove，andtonightIketoldherhisdecision—divorce．Elihathermarriagewasnotamistake；herwasherdivorce．Loveandlustcouldbeseparate．Loveiritualintercoursebetweentwopeople．EverytimeshewaswithIkeaaloveforhim,itbroughtitsownfulfillment,pleteinitself,withouttheneedforphysitimacy;justasapletelysatisfyingsexualintercoursesometimeshasnoneedforspirituallove．Elinasattherelookinglostandpensive．

5

"Duringtheyearofseparation，ImyeyesonanothermanbecauseIwaoremainfaithfultoIke,eventhoughheallowedmetohaveaffairs．YouseeIstilllovehim，orIwouldn’tkeephispictureomyheart．Buttrarytomyexpectations，Ikehasgedpletelyduringthisyearofseparationintothegaymanyoujustsaw．Todayheotonlytotellmeofhisdecisionforadivorce,butalsoofhispnsforasexualtransformationintoawoman!Istilllovehim,reallyIdo..."Elinagulpeddownhergssofwinewhichhadhardlybeentouched，asifhopingtodrownhersorrowanddisappoiindrink．Dimitriquietlyfinishedhisdrinkandslowlyfilledbothgssesfromthedeter,thinkingofsomethingtosaytoher．Ptitudesaywordsofsotionwereuselessifhewaalkheroutofherdespairingdepressioothinkofafreshapproach．

"Thereisohingweuseeveryday,evenwhenweareasleep．Doyouknowwhatitis，Elina?"

"Clothes?"

"No,wegowithoutclothes,butthisisindispensable.”Elinashookherhead,herexpressionwooden,andshedidn’tseemmuterested．"Itisourfleshbody,Elina.”Shelookedsurprised,buthereyeswerestilldazedandfused．

"Theexistehingsweuseeverydayisoftenoverlookedbecausebeingsousedtothem，wetakethemfrantedandareonlyawareofthemwhenweareill．Onthesurface，ourthoughtstrolourbody,butorary,ourfleshbodyoftentrolourthoughts．Forexample，whenwearehungrywethinkoffood．Whenweneedfulfillmehinkofsex．TakeIke’sstrangedecisiontoday．Ifyouthinkofitinthistext，asbeingdictatedbyhisfleshbody,youwillseethelogiaturalnessaabilityofhischoidwilloosurprised．Withabeautifulwifewhomhelovesandwholoveshiminspiteofhisimpotency,isitsosurprisingthatheshouldseektogiveuphismalesexualitvandlookforotherfulfillment?Everyonehasarighttochoosehowtousehisfleshbody．Infact,howtotreatone’sbodyisanimportantmotifoflife.”Hestoppedtotakeadrinkandasked,"Now,letmeaskyouthis,Elina．Howareyougoingtotreatyourfleshbody?"

"Idon’tknowknow.”saidElina，stiltaloss.